If I left the zoo

Today I simply offer a “what if.” I’m typically not one to speculate on hypothetical circumstances that are beyond my control, but this one is a bit different. It’s not my attempt to play God, but maybe to hear his heart.

I was sitting in a church pew recently and began thinking about the future. This isn’t out of the ordinary. It really happens rather frequently in this wonderful “Hey, I’m actually about to graduate and hit the ‘real world” season of life.”

I began running through my options and thinking about all the different paths I could take. Literally, there are dozens. Then I started to feel pressured; thus, the conflict and reason for my writing here.

I’ve begun to realize that I’ve been inadvertently lead my entire life to buy into the American Dream. At one point I found myself convinced that “happiness” in life comes from a house, big money, 3.5 kids, a mortgage and a brand new car. Don’t hear me wrong, there is nothing wrong with this situation, but I would challenge that it doesn’t contain everything it’s sold for.

We who are in this, above mentioned, season of life are called to make big decisions. So, it makes sense that we take time to make sure that our priorities are in the right place. If we walk with no direction we’ll never end up where we intend.

It could be compared to a lion in a cage. If you’ve seen them, you can confirm that the beasts are intimidating, even from behind the steel bars. Small children won’t go near the exhibit and it makes even my insides a bit uneasy to stand behind what I know is an inadequate barrier. I wonder if this is how an enemy, who is intent on convincing a limitless generation to settle, views us.

I fear the lion because as I stand on the outside I know it’s potential. I’ve seen National Geographic; I know what these guys can do. I wonder if the enemy stands on the outside, sees the potential, and feels his insides shake at the thought this generation’s Pauls and Peters standing up and changing their world for the fame of Jesus Christ.

Culture desires to cage prospective potential with bars of convention and expectations. I’ve sat in churches that do the same. So my question today is “what if?” What if the ones who felt “called”, “marked”, and “scared” by Jesus really didn’t just sit still and settle for guaranteed comfort? What if our knees didn’t weaken at the thought of a risk; what if it makes our hearts race? What if a generation threw down their nets? What if, WE said “I don’t want to fund other people dreams? I want to chase my own!”

“Full life” requires that we step through the bars and look for more. When Paul penned the infamous words “to live is Christ, to die is gain” he was sitting in prison. I would offer that he was probably not concerned about his retirement plan, newest car, or designer jeans. These things aren’t bad, I enjoy them myself, but they simply aren’t worth planting a life on.

So that’s my heart as of late. Step through… and look for more.

It all started with a couple phone calls and a good idea. Add a big pile of wood, some freshly cut cedar trees and pick-up trucks to the equation and you get a night in the country with some good food, a nice fire and the best company anyone could ever ask for.



Yes sir, you guessed correctly, it was bonfire time at my house. Dunnahoo sat with his camera ready as Bob and I depleted the cedar tree population in Auburntown Tennessee.


"Don't you need a permit to do that? Forget the fire, you're cutting down trees!!!" No sir, it's not like we have a shortage and when you live somewhere in-between Woodbury and a place called Auburntown no body really cares what you do.


These pictures were no "disposable camera accident." They are the handywork of skilled photographer Mr. John Dunnahoo.





As the stray car drove by I'm sure they admired our masterpiece of a 15ft bonfire. Ladies and gentlemen that right there is a picture of a successful Royal Ambassador Alumni building a fire, minus the string and stopwatch, of course.

The reaction above is the result of adding 6 feet of Blackcats to a fire. It was probably the best idea I've ever heard of.






The above are from when we decided to do a Fire Worship Dance, Old Testament Style... or not; but they are the other half of the tree cutting duo and a chair we found... and burned after it served it's purpose for a short time.



And finally a conclusion to a perfect evening. Six hours of fire warmth, star gazing, and the entire Double Disc Garth Live CD. I don't think it gets much better.

So, I've decided that blogging isn't just for "important" discussions... sometimes it's just for "life."

I've got a beautiful blessing in my life named Abby and a couple weeks back I got to go to the beach with her family. I thought I'd share a couple pictures with the blogging world.

A day in Seaside where Truman Show was filmed. It really looks just the same in real life.

Baytown Wharf one evening.

NO, they are not capri pants... just rolled up to not get sandy (just in case you were thinking that...)

The ladies... (Abs, her mom, Megan, and sister, Rachel)

Jon, David, Lynn (the dad) and myself

One of those things I get easily talked into doing...

Jon and Rach

And finally another one of those pics you can't leave the beach without...

The Lord is good. It's nice to live life know that I can see him outside the church walls. Maybe even in vacations. He is a tangible God who is faithful to his promises and is infinitely more valuable than we could ever imagine.

JV

Bread... but Chains

Social Justice. To be honest, the term has started to strike a nerve when I hear it. Not the kind that irritates, but the kind that catches my attention. It’s been said that this term will define our entire generation. Specifically, Bono has said the way we respond to the Aids crisis in Africa will define us.

It’s true. We live in a world full of dying orphans, child soldiers, sex slaves and filthy rich white men who justify it all. We live in a world that’s broken to its very core on every level. Where do we find a solution? How do we solve the problems that seem to outnumber my ability to count them all?

As Christians we’re given two commands; to love the Lord with all my heart (number one), and then to love my neighbor as myself (coming second on the list). This is where we find our problem. Somewhere along the way the action of “loving” someone got watered down to mean “feed them”, “build them a well”, or “just meet their need.”

My fellow redeemers, if we look at a man and give him bread but put forth no effort to break his chains we do not love him. We simply use him and leave him a captive to the enemy we were set free from. Our actions then are not rooted in love but pride. The motivations behind them were not to “love” him, but to make ourselves feel better about our own life because we did something noteworthy. In reality, it’s a rather selfish attempt. We can’t loose sight of the fact that no matter how bad this world seems to be, it is temporary. Our intentions must be to meet more than just his physical needs.

As light in a dark world it is our responsibility to not live a self-centered life. Jesus actually said “whatever you do for the least of these, you’ve done for me.” (Matthew 25:40) We are called to meet the needs of those less fortunate than a western-culture-college kid who drinks Starbucks three times a week. I’m called to not be so wrapped up in my iPod that I miss those who haven’t eaten this week.

We’re called to go. We’re called to love the unlovable. We’re called to meet needs, but more than anything we’re called to “deliver from bondage those who sit in darkness.” (Isaiah 42)

Take them water.
Take them relief.
Feed their children.
Deliver them from slavery.
Give them a second chance.
Show them life.
But ABOVE ALL ELSE, show them Jesus.

Love without Jesus is not love.

I typically would not consider doing this, but I stumbled (term used loosely) upon a very well written blog by a Mr Steve McCoy. It offers a different perspective on a debate I've often found myself a part of.

Just because I offer it doesn't mean I agree whole heartedly with it, just that I think it's worth tabling for discussion.

**
Let's keep thinking through alcohol and abstention.Generally speaking, both sides of the issue of alcohol agree that there is no way to prove biblically that Christians should abstain from alcohol. I know there are exceptions (some of them in my inbox this week), but let's start with the premise that we can't build an air tight case for abstinence from the Bible.

The case is then often pushed to two areas (surely there are more). First, sometimes the case is made for a less fermented wine in the Bible or Welch's flowing at weddings. Some people (I've become a magnet for some of them) will go to great lengths to explain how wine in the Bible had much lower alcohol content. I've read long, rambling posts, discussion board threads, etc on this.

I'm not convinced, but I don't think it really matters that much. People in biblical times were getting drunk and so are people today, so who cares how much alcohol content there is in a drink? There are abusers looking to abuse. The biblical point doesn't change. It's abuse that is the problem, not the alcohol content. You can sip whiskey, mix the Captain with Coke, or whatever. As long as you don't get drunk and drink for the glory of God, you are cool, biblically speaking.

So the argument for alcohol content, in my opinion, is a bit of a red herring. It is off topic. The biblical command remains, and is sufficient. Isn't that great?! It's sufficient whether we buy and drink a Smithwick's or a Seagrams 7.The second thing the lack of biblical evidence for total abstinence does to the alcohol conversation is drive some to say that we live in a culture of abuse and therefore abstinence is a must in THIS culture. But that's almost never really the point of those who argue this. If it were, they would allow for alcohol consumption for our missionaries in other cultures where things are different. But they don't allow that, which shows they really want to make an extra-biblical rule (legalism) for all of us.

But let's give the benefit of the doubt, at least for the sake of the argument. Let's say people with this position really believe it's about an abusing culture, and their inconsistency in application is out of their hands (denominational monetary pressures at work). I get that. And I understand this position and argued for it until a couple of years ago. In fact, I remember being at a Founder's Conference while in seminary and spending a couple of hours one night arguing my guts out with a Presbyterian guy about how everyone should abstain. This guy *gasp* made his own beer!

I completely disagree with this argument for abstention now. I could take the easy route and say I'd rather follow biblical rules than extra-biblical ones. But even more, my reasoning is found in the Cross that created the Church. The church is a redemptive community. We live not only the experience of redemption (I'm redeemed/being redeemed) but also the works of redemption (I'm redeeming). That's why our mission is both words and works, speaking and doing redemption.

And if we are working out our salvation through being redeemed and redeeming, then our response to cultural abuses is not to abstain but to redeem. That not only pushes us to maturity by teaching us how to eat, drink, and have sex to the glory of God (though it won't come easy), but it is also a witness to the world that God redeems. The pervert throws away the pornography (abuse) and learns to love sex with his wife (redemption). The glutton refuses to order a 5 piece fried chicken and fries meal (abuse) and learns to order a salad with light dressing instead (redemption). The alcohol abuser stops drinking until drunk (abuse) and learns to stop after a beer or two (redemption).

As long as we make the issue "abstaining," we will miss expressing and embodying redemption. And I'm afraid the message we will send is that good things can be perverted beyond redemption.

*** END

Thoughts?

As I sit here my ribs hurt.

They hurt because of the Ultimate Frisbee Tournament earlier this week. I took a few hard hits and spills and when you don't usually play that hard… you feel it the next day. The rush of competition and the adrenaline it brings comes with a small price. It may be the "man" coming out in me, but I think it is well worth it! I may feel it the next day, but I wake up knowing that I played hard.

Then, as I sit here and think about it all, my heart hurts.

It hurts for some of the guys I met on the field. Who seemingly embrace everything this world has to offer but in reality only helplessly grope for the wind. The guys who bow at everything one could imagine attempting to fulfill themselves, but walk away empty night after night.

At the risk of revealing my own selfishness I admit to making a couple comments like "yeah, that's why you pay for your friends" when someone would take a play a bit too seriously. But later as I drove home and as I sit here thinking back I look a bit deeper than my surface level selfishness.

It could be compared to a rich man looking at a poor man and making fun of him as he begs and scrounges for food.

It would be foolish and pointless to stereotype any group of people any certain way so I refuse to.

But it goes further than just that single situation. It's all around us. People attempting to fill their lives with things that were never ever meant to fill them. It's like trying to survive on a diet of only cupcake icing. The icing is the "extra" stuff in life. (A nice house, good food, loving family and nice friends, car to drive, new Bible to carry to church, money in my bank account, being warm at night, etc…) Although we as a western culture may view that stuff as necessary, and inside of these things may actually find our very identity, that's something these things aren't capable of providing. The only thing in this life that will every TRULY satisfy is a relationship with the Creator.

The world who looks so full and satisfied, is actually starving and desperate.

I pray they are lead to the table and are given the ability to feast on the reality of who Jesus Christ truly is.

What am I trying to say here… nothing ground breaking or revolutionary. Just a thought I was meant to sit on for a while.

Somewhere in the midst of the last few nights I was taught something. I was given a chance to see the value of what I have in the face of what others are missing. The gift that identifies me isn't universal, it's personal.

And I thought it was a simple game of Frisbee…

Thoughts From an Evening
(Originally Posted June 29th, 2006)

We wrap our arms around one another and pray in the front yard of the house we've called home, on Thursday nights, for varying amounts of time. In the moment a soft spoken tear wells gently in my eye. In an attempt to hide it I refuse to acknowledge it. As I make my way for my truck it quietly falls, cutting at my pride, as I reach for the door. I turn my back and walk away from something I know will never return.

With memories tight inside our hearts, the lights turned off, the doors locked and the crowd dispersed, we all do the same. What we know as Atwood Family Fun has now come to an end.

The night is warm in late June and annoying, repetitious fireworks screech in the distance. I take my seat in what is probably one of my favorite places on this earth and begin to ponder and attempt to concentrate. Tonight my seat faces west, so as I beg a question, I watch the sun set faithfully yet again.

I beg the 'always productive' question of "why." "Why do seasons change?" I'm completely uncomfortable with it and have never grown to like it. Why do people I love leave? Why do people change? Why do things happen that are so far beyond my control but affect me so deeply? How can a human walk in and out of a life so quickly but leave an imprint on a heart that will be felt for eternity?

The Atwood's home is only a small example of a season changing and coming to a close. But, tonight, I think it's the thematic concept more than the event that bothers me so.

I'm drawn back to a passage that's big in my life. It's Hebrews 12:7-11

7It is for discipline that you endure; God deals with you as with sons; for what son is there whom his father does not discipline?
8But if you are without discipline, of which all have become partakers, then you are illegitimate children and not sons.
9Furthermore, we had earthly fathers to discipline us, and we respected them; shall we not much rather be subject to the Father of spirits, and live?
10For they disciplined us for a short time as seemed best to them, but He disciplines us for our good, so that we may share His holiness.
11All discipline for the moment seems not to be joyful, but sorrowful; yet to those who have been trained by it, afterwards it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness.

Someone told me the other night the thing to know about this passage is that the translator got a word wrong. "Discipline" should actually be translated "training." So everywhere we read "discipline" we should read "training."

All training for the moment seems not to be joyful, but it hurts like crazy, yet those who have been trained by it, afterwards, it yields the PEACEFUL FRUIT of righteousness. (jv paraphrase)

Season changing is not comfortable. It seems sooo… NOT peaceful. It is no fun (and it tends to happen rather rapidly in college), but it is all intentional. It is ALL to train God's children into who He has for them to be.

As the night has quietly slipped up and covered my lovely 'boro for the evening I'm reminded of the trainer and His UNCHANGING faithfulness. Just as He brings the night, He WILL bring the morning.

So I tuck my memories back in my pocket, close my Bible and Journal, and simply pray. Rest in the maker…

Clinging Yet Moving

- JV

Sunsets and Journals
(Originally Posted June 13th, 2006)

Something only I see, but now you

My journal: May 24th, 2006 – Location: Somewhere over the North Pole

Sunsets, One of my favorite of all God’s creations. I look to my left and see an amazing, blazing, red depression of the object that gives physical life to the earth. I know God painted this one just for me. I knew it when I opened my shade and saw it. So, I cut off my movie and picked up my journal in an attempt to somewhat preserve the moment.

Tonight we will stay in Newark. As badly as a want to get home, I’m content with only the next stop because it puts me on American soil and out of China. I love the country and the people, but I’m ready for home.

Wow, the sunset reminds me of my favorite Hawaii moments. Observing a sunset that simply stops time and allows God to scream “LOOK AT ME!!!” And I do. I look at that and know that the millions of brilliant colors coming from outer space point to a creator who is passionately in love with me.

Now, I never even asked to be “romanced” here, but that sets a heart at ease?!

Below is a snow-covered tundra. One I’ve never really seen before. Even though cold and non-receptive the sun still exerts incalculable amounts of energy onto its surface. Makes me wonder if there are times in my life when I resemble the tundra? The sun is still exerting energy, faithfully rising and setting, but the tundra is simply not interested.

Not interested in the life that could be. Simply content being cold, hard, and barren. It’s not an issue of a lack of effort on the part of the sun. The tundra has to look at it rising and setting each day as it lays there stagnantly unchanged.

May I never be like the tundra. I hope I spend every morning I’m blessed to be on this waiting room, ball of dust, we call earth waking up and draining every ounce of energy I can from the one who made the sun rise and set. The tundra is vast, intricately detailed, and beautiful… but it’s dead, barren, and lonely.

John 10:10 comes to mind

“The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly.”

Thank you for showing me, I’m ready to go… - JV

Rhythmic Life
(Originally posted May 26th, 2006)

Walking while Chris Martin soothes my thinking mind with lyrics speaking of “igniting bones” and I’m counting in beats of four... the beat does not match up and I find myself disgruntled. Then realizing the song is not written in counts of four, but counts of three. So, mid-stride… I adjust.

Sometimes life falls into this… We’re walking along counting in what we did last season or what we assume the count should be only to realize things are suddenly off beat. This takes a slight mid-stride adjustment then things are brought back together and one wonders why they spent so long on the three count when the four was right in front of them.

“To dance in the rhythm of King Jesus”

Not walk, not abide, not think, not believe, not sing… but to DANCE in the rhythmic life that is lived inside of Christ Jesus alone.

To Dance: To move rhythmically, usually to music, using prescribed or improvised steps and gestures.

What’s your rhythm?
What are you dancing to?
Are you dancing at all?

What does it mean to “dance in the rhythm of King Jesus?”

That’s beautiful language

- JV

Gone
(Originally posted April 28th, 2006)
So, in a couple hours I board my last plane out of Hilo Hawaii knowing I'll probably never come back.

I turn my back to this place and walk out. This semester has been crazy but I'm so thankful for it. It held a few things I didn't expect but they were all exactly as God had planned. I leave here with a peace that can only come from Him.

I'm walking out of one season of life... into a whole new one. And to be honest, I'm not sure what the next one holds, just like I was unsure what this one would hold.

But my last 4 months confirm what was on my heart when this picture was taken. God is big! He has you in the palm of his hand! He loves you and He is FOR YOU... and if God is for us... who can be against us?

Praise His holy name!

Your Glory...
(originally posted on April 25th 2006)

REJOICE in the Lord ALWAYS. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is NEAR. Do not be anxious about anything, but in EVERYTHING, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your request to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death

your perfect love is casting out fear

even when im caught in the middle

of the storms of this life

I won't turn back, I know you are near

and i will fear no evil

for my God is with me

and if my God is with me

whom then shall i fear

whom then shall i fear

OH NO YOU NEVER LET GO

THROUGH THE CALM AND THROUGH THE STORM

OH NO YOU LET GO

EVERY HIGH AND EVERY LOW

OH NO YOU NEVER LET GO

LORD, YOU NEVER LET GO OF ME

I can see the light, that is coming

for the heart that holds on

A glorious light beyond all compare

and there will bean end to these troubles

but until that day comes,

well live to know you here on this earth

and i will fear no evil

for my God is with me

and if my God is with me

whom then shall i fear

whom then shall i fear

OH NO, YOU NEVER LET GO

THROUGH THE CALM AND THROUGH THE STORM

OH NO, YOU LET GO

EVERY HIGH AND EVERY LOW

OH NO, YOU NEVER LET GO

LORD, YOU NEVER LET GO OF ME

You keep on loving and you never let go!

Ill keep on singing...

OH NO, YOU NEVER LET GO

THROUGH THE CALM AND THROUGH THE STORM

OH NO, YOU LET GO

EVERY HIGH AND EVERY LOW

OH NO, YOU NEVER LET GO

LORD YOU NEVER LET GO OF ME

I can see the light, that is coming

for the HEART THAT HOLDS ON

and there will be an end to these troubles

but until that day comes

STILL I WILL PRAISE YOU

STILL I WILL PRAISE YOU

oh no you never let go

through the calm and through the storm

oh no you never let go

every high and every low

oh no you never let go

Lord, YOU NEVER LET GO OF ME

God WILL have His Glory...

Determination of Freedom

It feels good to feel the freedom to sit and write once again.

“Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom.”
2 Corinthians 3:17

I currently find myself in my lovely little house here in Hilo Hawaii. I awoke this morning on a different island, Maui, but after a quick 7 am flight, I’m back where I began. The weekend was crazy and God is faithful. I got a chance to go to Maui, so I did. Wouldn’t you if $150 was all it cost?

The weekend was filled with whales, fish, a lost Japanese guy named Yuji who was introduced to the Name above all Names (you can pray for that), Krispie Kreme doughnuts (praise God), a lot of “chillin”, late night conversations, and very little homework done on my part.

I’m thankful for freedom. We serve a chain-breaking, big axe carrying, light-shinning, freedom giving, gracious, loving God; and all the darkness in the world, which we are contained in for the moment, TREMBLES at the sound of His name!

“Yes, Lord, walking in the way of your laws, we wait for you; your name and renown are the desire of our hearts.” Isaiah 26:8

I was walking with Kira (L) on campus today and the definition of “renown” was “something everybody should know, has no negative connotation, and you’re proud of.” Pretty good definition if you ask me, especially coming from a girl with no concept of the word in its truest form.

Why don’t you pray for Kira, right now. God is working on her heart.

(Did you pray for a prospective sister? This is one of those parts not to skip.)

Question: What’s you purpose in life? I’m not after a church answer. I’m after one that honest… just honest. When you wake up in the morning, what’s the first thing on your mind? As you go through the day, what consumes your thoughts?

"I, the Lord, have called you in righteousness; I will take hold of your hand. I will keep you and will make you to be a covenant for the people and a light for the gentiles, to open eyes that are blind, to free captives from prison and to release from the dungeon those who sit in darkness. I am the Lord, that is my name! I will not give my glory to another or my praise to idols." Isaiah 42: 6-8